The concept of 

interpersonal relationship involves social associations, connections, or affiliations

between two or more people. Interpersonal relationships vary in their degree of intimacy or self-
disclosure, but also in their duration, in their reciprocity and in their power distribution, to name only
a few dimensions. The context can vary from family or kinship relations, friendship, marriage,
relations with associates, work, clubs, neighborhoods, and places of worship. Relationships may be
regulated by law, custom, or mutual agreement, and form the basis of social groups and
of society as a whole. Interpersonal relationships are created by people's interactions with one
another in social situations.[1]
This association may be based on inference,[further explanation needed] love, solidarity, support,
regular business interactions, or some other type of social connection or commitment. Interpersonal
relationships thrive through equitable and reciprocal compromise;[citation needed] they form in the context of
social, cultural and other influences.
The study of interpersonal relationships involves several branches of the social sciences, including
such disciplines as communication studies, psychology, anthropology, social work, sociology,
and mathematics.
The scientific study of relationships evolved during the 1990s and came to be referred to as
"relationship science,"[2] after research done by Ellen Berscheid and Elaine Hatfield. This field of
study distinguishes itself from anecdotal evidence or from pseudo-experts by basing conclusions on
data and on objective analysis.

Contents

 1Types
o 1.1Intimate relationships
 1.1.1Romantic relationships generally
 1.1.2Romance
 1.1.3Life stages
 1.1.4Significant other
 1.1.5Marital relationship
o 1.2Family relationships
 1.2.1Parent–child
 1.2.2Siblings
o 1.3Other examples of interpersonal relationship
 2Ways that interpersonal relationships begin
 3Stages
o 3.1Terminating a relationship
 4Pathological relationships
o 4.1Abusive
o 4.2Codependent
o 4.3Narcissistic
 5Importance
o 5.1Need to belong
o 5.2Social exchange
o 5.3Relational self
 6Power and dominance
 7Relationship satisfaction
o 7.1Theories and empirical research
 7.1.1Confucianism
 7.1.2Minding relationships
 8In popular culture
o 8.1Popular perceptions
o 8.2Social media
 9See also
 10References
 11Further reading
 12External links

Types[edit]
Intimate relationships[edit]
Romantic relationships generally[edit]
Romantic relationships have been defined in countless ways, by writers, philosophers, religions,
scientists, and in the modern day, relationship counselors. Two popular definitions of love are
Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love and Fisher's theory of love. [3][4][5] Sternberg defines love in
terms of intimacy, passion, and commitment, which he claims exist in varying levels in different
romantic relationships. Fisher defines love as composed of three stages: attraction, romantic love,
and attachment. Romantic relationships may exist between two people of any gender, or among a
group of people (see polyamory).
Romance[edit]
The single defining quality of a romantic relationship is the presence of love. Love is therefore
equally difficult to define. Hazan and Shaver[6] define love, using Ainsworth's attachment theory, as
comprising proximity, emotional support, self-exploration, and separation distress when parted from
the loved one. Other components commonly agreed to be necessary for love are physical attraction,
similarity,[7] reciprocity,[4] and self-disclosure.[8]
Life stages[edit]
Early adolescent relationships are characterized by companionship, reciprocity, and sexual
experiences. As emerging adults mature, they begin to develop attachment and caring qualities in
their relationships, including love, bonding, security, and support for partners. Earlier relationships
also tend to be shorter and exhibit greater involvement with social networks. [9] Later relationships are
often marked by shrinking social networks, as the couple dedicates more time to each other than to
associates.[10] Later relationships also tend to exhibit higher levels of commitment. [9]
Most psychologists and relationship counselors predict a decline of intimacy and passion over time,
replaced by a greater emphasis on companionate love (differing from adolescent companionate love
in the caring, committed, and partner-focused qualities). However, couple studies have found no
decline in intimacy nor in the importance of sex, intimacy, and passionate love to those in longer or
later-life relationships.[11] Older people tend to be more satisfied in their relationships, but face greater
barriers to entering new relationships than do younger or middle-aged people. [12] Older women in
particular face social, demographic, and personal barriers; men aged 65 and older are nearly twice
as likely as women to be married, and widowers are nearly three times as likely to be dating 18
months following their partner's loss compared to widows.
Significant other[edit]
The term significant other gained popularity during the 1990s, reflecting the growing acceptance of
'non-heteronormative' relationships. It can be used to avoid making an assumption about the gender
or relational status (e.g. married, cohabitating, civil union) of a person's intimate partner. Cohabiting
relationships continue to rise, with many partners considering cohabitation to be nearly as serious
as, or a substitute for, marriage. [12] LGBTQ people in particular may face unique challenges in
establishing and maintaining intimate relationships. The strain of 'internalized homo-negativity' and
of presenting themselves in line with socially acceptable gender norms can reduce the satisfaction
and emotional and health benefits they experience in their relationships. [13][14][15] LGBTQ youth also
lack the social support and peer connections enjoyed by hetero-normative young people.
[16]
 Nonetheless, comparative studies of homosexual and heterosexual couples have found few
differences in relationship intensity, quality, satisfaction, or commitment. [17]
Marital relationship[edit]
Although nontraditional relationships continue to rise, marriage still makes up the majority of
relationships except among emerging adults. [18] It is also still considered by many to occupy a place
of greater importance among family and social structures.

Family relationships[edit]
Parent–child[edit]
In ancient times, parent–child relationships were often marked by fear, either of rebellion or
abandonment, resulting in the strict filial roles in, for example, ancient Rome and China. [19][20] Freud
conceived of the Oedipal complex, the supposed obsession that young boys have towards their
mothers and the accompanying fear and rivalry with their fathers, and the Electra complex, in which
the young girl feels that her mother has castrated her and therefore becomes obsessed with her
father. Freud's ideas influenced thought on parent–child relationships for decades. [21]
Another early conception of parent–child relationships was that love only existed as a biological drive
for survival and comfort on the child's part.[citation needed] In 1958, however, Harry Harlow's study " The Hot
Wire Mother'' comparing rhesus' reactions to wire surrogate "mothers" and cloth "mothers"
demonstrated that affection was wanted by any caregiver and not only the surrogate mothers. [22]
The study laid the groundwork for Mary Ainsworth's attachment theory, showing how the infants
used their cloth "mothers" as a secure base from which to explore. [23][24] In a series of studies using
the strange situation, a scenario in which an infant is separated from then reunited with the parent,
Ainsworth defined three styles of parent-child relationship.

 Securely attached infants miss the parent, greet them happily upon return, and show normal
exploration and lack of fear when the parent is present.
 Insecure avoidant infants show little distress upon separation and ignore the caregiver when
they return. They explore little when the parent is present. Infants also tend to be emotionally
unavailable.[25]
 Insecure ambivalent infants are highly distressed by separation, but continue to be distressed
upon the parent's return; these infants also explore little and display fear even when the parent
is present.
 Some psychologists have suggested a fourth attachment style, disorganized, so called
because the infants' behavior appeared disorganized or disoriented. [26]
Secure attachments are linked to better social and academic outcomes, greater moral
internalization,[further explanation needed] and less delinquency for children, and have been found to predict later
relationship success.[27][28][4]
For most of the late nineteenth through the twentieth century, the perception of adolescent-parent
relationships was that of a time of upheaval. G. Stanley Hall popularized the "Sturm und drang", or
storm and stress, model of adolescence. [29] Psychological research has painted a much tamer
picture. Although adolescents are more risk-seeking and emerging adults have higher suicide rates,
they are largely less volatile and have much better relationships with their parents than the storm
and stress model would suggest[30] Early adolescence often marks a decline in parent-child
relationship quality, which then re-stabilizes through adolescence, and relationships are sometimes
better in late adolescence than prior to its onset. [31] With the increasing average age at marriage and
more youths attending college and living with parents past their teens, the concept of a new period
called emerging adulthood gained popularity. This is considered a period of uncertainty and
experimentation between adolescence and adulthood. During this stage, interpersonal relationships
are considered to be more self-focused, and relationships with parents may still be influential. [32]
Siblings[edit]
Sibling relationships have a profound effect on social, psychological, emotional, and academic
outcomes. Although proximity and contact usually decreases over time, sibling bonds continue to
affect people throughout their lives. Sibling relationships are affected by parent-child relationships,
such that sibling relationships in childhood often reflect the positive or negative aspects of children's
relationships with their parents.[33]

Other examples of interpersonal relationship[edit]

 Egalitarian and platonic friendship[34]
 Enemy
 Frenemy — a person with whom an individual maintains a friendly interaction despite underlying
conflict, possibly encompassing rivalry, mistrust, jealousy or competition[35]
 Neighbor
 Familiar stranger
 Business relationships
o Partnership
o Employer and employee
o Contractor
o Customer
o Landlord and tenant
o Coworker
 Official

Ways that interpersonal relationships begin [edit]

Proximity
Proximity increases the chance for repeated exposure to the same person. Long-term exposure can
develop familiarity is more likely to trigger like or hate. [36]
Technological advance
The internet removes the problem of lack of communication due to long-distance. People can
communicate with others who live far away from them through video calls or text. Internet is a
medium for people to be close to others who are not physically near them. [36]   
Similarity
People prefer to make friends with others who are similar to them because their thoughts and
feelings are more likely to be understood.[36]

Stages[edit]
Interpersonal relationships are dynamic systems that change continuously during their existence.
Like living organisms, relationships have a beginning, a lifespan, and an end. They tend to grow and
improve gradually, as people get to know each other and become closer emotionally, or they
gradually deteriorate as people drift apart, move on with their lives and form new relationships with
others. One of the most influential models of relationship development was proposed by
psychologist George Levinger.[37] This model was formulated to describe heterosexual, adult romantic
relationships, but it has been applied to other kinds of interpersonal relations as well. According to
the model, the natural development of a relationship follows five stages:

1. Acquaintance and acquaintanceship – Becoming acquainted depends on previous

relationships, physical proximity, first impressions, and a variety of other factors. If two
people begin to like each other, continued interactions may lead to the next stage, but
acquaintance can continue indefinitely. Another example is the association.
2. Buildup – During this stage, people begin to trust and care about each other. The need for
intimacy, compatibility and such filtering agents as common background and goals will
influence whether or not interaction continues.
3. Continuation – This stage follows a mutual commitment to quite a strong and close long-term
friendship, romantic relationship, or even marriage. It is generally a long, relatively stable
period. Nevertheless, continued growth and development will occur during this time. Mutual
trust is important for sustaining the relationship.
4. Deterioration – Not all relationships deteriorate, but those that do tend to show signs of
trouble. Boredom, resentment, and dissatisfaction may occur, and individuals may
communicate less and avoid self-disclosure. Loss of trust and betrayals may take place as
the downward spiral continues, eventually ending the relationship. (Alternately, the
participants may find some way to resolve the problems and reestablish trust and belief in
others.)
5. Ending – The final stage marks the end of the relationship, either by breakups, death or by
spatial separation for quite some time and severing all existing ties of either friendship
or romantic love.
Terminating a relationship[edit]
According to the latest Systematic Review of the Economic Literature on the Factors associated with
Life Satisfaction (dating from 2007), stable and secure relationships are beneficial, and
correspondingly, relationship dissolution is harmful. [38]
The American Psychological Association has summarized the evidence on breakups. Breaking up
can actually be a positive experience when the relationship did not expand the self and when the
breakup leads to personal growth. They also recommend some ways to cope with the experience:

 Purposefully focusing on the positive aspects of the breakup ("factors leading up to the break-
up, the actual break-up, and the time right after the break-up")
 Minimizing the negative emotions
 Journaling the positive aspects of the breakup (e.g. "comfort, confidence, empowerment,
energy, happiness, optimism, relief, satisfaction, thankfulness, and wisdom"). This exercise
works best, although not exclusively, when the breakup is mutual. [39]
Less time between a breakup and a subsequent relationship predicts higher self-esteem, attachment
security, emotional stability, respect for your new partner, and greater well-being. Furthermore,
rebound relationships don't last any shorter than regular relationships. [40][41] 60% of people are friends
with one or more ex.[42] 60% of people have had an off-and-on relationship. 37% of cohabiting
couples, and 23% of the married, have broken up and gotten back together with their existing
partner.[43]
Terminating a marital relationship implies divorce or annulment. One reason cited for divorce is
infidelity. The determinants of unfaithfulness are debated by dating service providers, feminists,
academics, and science communicators. [44][45][46][47] According to Psychology Today, women's, rather
than men's, level of commitment more strongly determines if a relationship will continue. [48]

Pathological relationships[edit]
Research conducted in Iran and other countries has shown that conflicts are common between
couples, and, in Iran, 92% of the respondents reported conflicts in their marriages. [49] These conflicts
cause major problems for couples and are caused due to multiple reasons.

Abusive[edit]
Abusive relationships involve either maltreatment or violence such as physical abuse, physical
neglect, sexual abuse, and emotional maltreatment. [50] Abusive relationships within the family are
very prevalent in the United States and usually involve women or children as victims. [51] Common
individual factors for abusers include low self-esteem, poor impulse control, external locus of control,
drug use, alcohol abuse, and negative affectivity.[52] There are also external factors such as stress,
poverty, and loss which contribute to likelihood of abuse. [53]

Codependent[edit]
Codependency initially focused on a codependent partner enabling substance abuse, but it has
become more broadly defined to describe a dysfunctional relationship with extreme dependence on
or preoccupation with another person. [54] There are some who even refer to codependency as an
addiction to the relationship.[55] The focus of codependents tends to be on the emotional state,
behavioral choices, thoughts, and beliefs of another person. [56] Often those who are codependent
neglect themselves in favor of taking care of others and have difficulty fully developing an identity of
their own.[57]

Narcissistic[edit]
Narcissists focus on themselves and often distance themselves from intimate relationships; the
focus of narcissistic interpersonal relationships is to promote one's self-concept. [58] Generally,
narcissists show less empathy in relationships and view love pragmatically or as a game involving
others' emotions.[59][58]
Narcissists are usually part of the personality disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). In
relationships, they tend to affect the other person as they attempt to use them to enhance their self-
esteem.[60] Specific types of NPD make a person incapable of having an interpersonal relationship
due to them being cunning, envious, and contemptuous. [60]

Importance[edit]
Human beings are innately social and are shaped by their experiences with others. There are
multiple perspectives to understand this inherent motivation to interact with others.

Need to belong[edit]
According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, humans need to feel love (sexual/nonsexual) and
acceptance from social groups (family, peer groups). In fact, the need to belong is so innately
ingrained that it may be strong enough to overcome physiological and safety needs, such as
children's attachment to abusive parents or staying in abusive romantic relationships. Such
examples illustrate the extent to which the psychobiological drive to belong is entrenched.

Social exchange[edit]
Another way to appreciate the importance of relationships is in terms of a reward framework. This
perspective suggests that individuals engage in relations that are rewarding in both tangible and
intangible ways. The concept fits into a larger theory of social exchange. This theory is based on the
idea that relationships develop as a result of cost-benefit analysis. Individuals seek out rewards in
interactions with others and are willing to pay a cost for said rewards. In the best-case scenario,
rewards will exceed costs, producing a net gain. This can lead to "shopping around" or constantly
comparing alternatives to maximize the benefits or rewards while minimizing costs.

Relational self[edit]
Relationships are also important for their ability to help individuals develop a sense of self. The
relational self is the part of an individual's self-concept that consists of the feelings and beliefs that
one has regarding oneself that develops based on interactions with others. [61] In other words, one's
emotions and behaviors are shaped by prior relationships. Relational self theory posits that prior and
existing relationships influence one's emotions and behaviors in interactions with new individuals,
particularly those individuals that remind him or her of others in his or her life. Studies have shown
that exposure to someone who resembles a significant other activates specific self-beliefs, changing
how one thinks about oneself in the moment more so than exposure to someone who does not
resemble one's significant other.[62]

Power and dominance[edit]

See also: Expressions of dominance

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Power is the ability to influence the behavior of other people. When two parties have or assert
unequal levels of power, one is termed "dominant" and the other "submissive". Expressions of
dominance can communicate intention to assert or maintain dominance in a relationship. Being
submissive can be beneficial because it saves time, emotional stress, and may avoid hostile actions
such as withholding of resources, cessation of cooperation, termination of the relationship,
maintaining a grudge, or even physical violence. Submission occurs in different degrees; for
example, some employees may follow orders without question, whereas others might express
disagreement but concede when pressed.
Groups of people can form a dominance hierarchy. For example, a hierarchical organization uses
a command hierarchy for top-down management. This can reduce time wasted in conflict over
unimportant decisions, prevents inconsistent decisions from harming the operations of the
organization, maintain alignment of a large population of workers with the goals of the owners (which
the workers might not personally share) and, if promotion is based on merit, help ensure that the
people with the best expertise make important decisions. This contrasts with group decision-
making and systems which encourage decision-making and self-organization by front-line
employees, who in some cases may have better information about customer needs or how to work
efficiently. Dominance is only one aspect of organizational structure.
A power structure describes power and dominance relationships in a larger society. For example,
a feudal society under a monarchy exhibits a strong dominance hierarchy in both economics and
physical power, whereas dominance relationships in a society with democracy and capitalism are
more complicated.
In business relationships, dominance is often associated with economic power. For example, a
business may adopt a submissive attitude to customer preferences (stocking what customers want
to buy) and complaints ("the customer is always right") in order to earn more money. A firm
with monopoly power may be less responsive to customer complaints because it can afford to adopt
a dominant position. In a business partnership a "silent partner" is one who adopts a submissive
position in all aspects, but retains financial ownership and a share of the profits.
Two parties can be dominant in different areas. For example, in a friendship or romantic relationship,
one person may have strong opinions about where to eat dinner, whereas the other has strong
opinions about how to decorate a shared space. It could be beneficial for the party with weak
preferences to be submissive in that area because it will not make them unhappy and avoids conflict
with the party that would be unhappy.
The breadwinner model is associated with gender role assignments where the male in a
heterosexual marriage would be dominant in all areas.

Relationship satisfaction[edit]
Social exchange theory and Rusbult's investment model shows that relationship satisfaction is based
on three factors: rewards, costs, and comparison levels (Miller, 2012). [63] Rewards refer to any
aspects of the partner or relationship that are positive. Conversely, costs are the negative or
unpleasant aspects of the partner or their relationship. Comparison level includes what each partner
expects of the relationship. The comparison level is influenced by past relationships, and general
relationship expectations they are taught by family and friends.
Individuals in long-distance relationships, LDRs, rated their relationships as more satisfying than
individuals in proximal relationship, PRs.[64][65] Alternatively, Holt and Stone (1988) found that long-
distance couples who were able to meet with their partner at least once a month had similar
satisfaction levels to unmarried couples who cohabitated. [66] Also, the relationship satisfaction was
lower for members of LDRs who saw their partner less frequently than once a month. LDR couples
reported the same level of relationship satisfaction as couples in PRs, despite only seeing each
other on average once every 23 days.[67]
Social exchange theory and the am investment model both theorize that relationships that are high
in costs would be less satisfying than relationships that are low in costs. LDRs have a higher level of
costs than PRs, therefore, one would assume that LDRs are less satisfying than PRs. Individuals in
LDRs are more satisfied with their relationships compared to individuals in PRs. [65] This can be
explained by unique aspects of the LDRs, how the individuals use relationship maintenance
behaviors, and the attachment styles of the individuals in the relationships. Therefore, the costs and
benefits of the relationship are subjective to the individual, and people in LDRs tend to report lower
costs and higher rewards in their relationship compared to PRs.[65]

Theories and empirical research[edit]

Confucianism[edit]
Confucianism is a study and theory of relationships especially within hierarchies. [68] Social harmony—
the central goal of Confucianism—results in part from every individual knowing his or her place in the
social order, and playing his or her part well. Particular duties arise from each person's particular
situation in relation to others. The individual stands simultaneously in several different relationships
with different people: as a junior in relation to parents and elders; and as a senior in relation to
younger siblings, students, and others. Juniors are considered in Confucianism to owe their seniors
reverence and seniors have duties of benevolence and concern toward juniors. A focus on mutuality
is prevalent in East Asian cultures to this day.
Minding relationships[edit]
The mindfulness theory of relationships shows how closeness in relationships may be enhanced.
Minding is the "reciprocal knowing process involving the nonstop, interrelated thoughts, feelings, and
behaviors of persons in a relationship." [69] Five components of "minding" include:[70]
1. Knowing and being known: seeking to understand the partner
2. Making relationship-enhancing attributions for behaviors: giving the benefit of the doubt
3. Accepting and respecting: empathy and social skills
4. Maintaining reciprocity: active participation in relationship enhancement
5. Continuity in minding: persisting in mindfulness

In popular culture[edit]
Popular perceptions[edit]
Popular perceptions of intimate relationships are strongly influenced by movies and television.
Common messages are that love is predestined, love at first sight is possible, and that love with the
right person always succeeds. Those who consume the most romance-related media tend to believe
in predestined romance and that those who are destined to be together implicitly understand each
other. These beliefs, however, can lead to less communication and problem-solving as well as giving
up on relationships more easily when conflict is encountered. [71]

Social media[edit]
Social media has changed the face of interpersonal relationships. Romantic interpersonal
relationships are no less impacted. For example, in the United States, Facebook has become an
integral part of the dating process for emerging adults. [72] Social media can have both positive and
negative impacts on romantic relationships. For example, supportive social networks have been
linked to more stable relationships.[73] However, social media usage can also facilitate conflict,
jealousy, and passive aggressive behaviors such as spying on a partner. [74] Aside from direct effects
on the development, maintenance, and perception of romantic relationships, excessive social
network usage is linked to jealousy and dissatisfaction in relationships. [75]
A growing segment of the population is engaging in purely online dating, sometimes but not always
moving towards traditional face-to-face interactions. These online relationships differ from face-to-
face relationships; for example, self-disclosure may be of primary importance in developing an online
relationship. Conflict management differs, since avoidance is easier and conflict resolution skills may
not develop in the same way. Additionally, the definition of infidelity is both broadened and narrowed,
since physical infidelity becomes easier to conceal but emotional infidelity (e.g. chatting with more
than one online partner) becomes a more serious offense. [73]