TRƯỜNG ĐẠI HỌC THƯƠNG MẠI

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BÀI THI HẾT HỌC PHẦN

HỌC PHẦN: KỸ NĂNG VIẾT

Họ và tên sinh viên: Lê Thị Phương Thảo Mã lớp học phần: 2061ENPR6511

Mã sinh viên: 19D170249 Số báo danh: 40

Ngày thi: 4/6/2020 Ngày nộp bài: 11/6/2020

Nội dung bài làm:

PHẦN1: BÁO CÁO THU HOẠCH

Question 1 (6 pts) How important is it to be coherent and cohesive in your writing? How
to meet such requirements?

It is an apparent fact that a good writing must have a topic and controlling ideas, support
and unity. But other elements which are vital features of writing are signs of excellent
coherence and cohesion. My perspectives below will enlighten how it is necessary for
writing skills and how we can use them effectively in writing?

First of all, what is conherence in writing? Conherence in writing is the logical bridge
between words, sentences and paragraphs. Conherence refers to the flow of our writings
and our ideas should be logically organized an appropriately sequenced into paragraphs.
Basically, coherence is a meaning – level association in order to make our ideas must be
closely related, logical and smoothy. Futhermore, conherence in writing is much more
difficult to sustain than coherent speech, simply because writers have no noverbal clues to
inform if their message is not clear. Therefore, we must make their patterrns of coherence
more explicit and much more careffully.

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So why is it important feature of writing skills espesically in acedemic writing? Firstly,
coherence will make sentences that are arranged in a particular order. This means
supporting ideas for main ideas and no ideas out of places. If there is no connection or
logical organization, our articles will become meaningless. Secondly, conherence will
show our writings logically and smoothly, in particularly, it expresses our logical
thinking. Therefore, in academic writings, they are indispensable factors to create an
excellent article. Without conherence, the readers or examniners will not understand what
the main points and supporting ideas…I am sure that they are poor articles, consequently,
we will get bad marks. Another reason is that coherent writing will be attract readers
who read our writings…As we can see, the ultimate goal of an effective writing is that it
must have a certain logic to convey the content to readers when approaching it. Finally,
coherence is one of the most important elements that make up a precise writing.

It is undeniable that coherence is essential characteristics of good writing, so how to meet

that demand in writing. There are many ways of creating logical and smoothy writings,
depending on our purpose. One of the practical tools that can help improve the coherence
of our writings is to use a concept map. The concept map is also known as “reverse
outline” since we make an outline of our paper after we have finished the main ideas of it.
To write down the main idea of each paragraph is called a topic sentence on a blank piece
of paper. To check if the topic sentences are connected to the thesis statement of our paper
or if we have strayed from our main arguments. As we repeat this process, it will help us
raise awareness of developing our arguments coherently and how to organize our ideas
effectively. In other ways, I think it is also a tip to make our writing coherence is that we
should review all the writings. The ways that able to make our writings more conherent is
to review it many times before submitting them. We should not rush with the ideas, try
maintaining consistency. As we know, the best writer rarely writes something perfectly at
the first time. The more we review what we write, the better we will understand the
connection between ideas. On the other hand, we aslo use the order of importance
description, or we can use chronogical order if we want to describe what happens in a
movie, novel…. As a stark example of poor coherence: “The industry has many

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advantages. It can draw on a great deal of research. It can also export products to key
trading partners. It has significant growth potential in the medium to long-term. It is
important to keep staff up-to-date with soft ware used in this industry.Wokers within this
industry need training.” The short paragraph seems not to have a clear principle of
sentence, it is not completely coherent. Therefore, we can do it again like that: “The
industry has many advantages. It can draw on a great deal of research, particular in
terms of strategies used for entering new markets. While there is significant growth
potential in the medium to long-term.It clear that wokers within this industry need
training. Therefore, it is important to keep staff up-to-date with soft ware used in this
industry.” In short, we have numerous ways to gain coherence in writing.

An alternative characteristic of good writing is cohesion. This word comes from the word
cohere, which means 'stick together'. Cohesion refers to the way we use vocabulary and
grammatical structures to make connection between the ideas within a text. Cohesive
devices are the words and strategies which we use to make the meaningful connections
between ideas within a text clear to readers.

Cohesion is also a very important aspect of academic writings, because it immediately

affects the tone of our writings. Although some instructors may say that we will not lose
points because of grammatical errors in our papers. But cohesive writings do not mean
just “grammatically correct” sentences; cohesive writing refer to the connection of your
ideas both at the sentence level and at the paragraph level. Moreover, conhesion promotes
clarity the sentences and paragraphs with acedemic texts. This is the job of the writer to
make these sentences and paragraphs as clear as possible. If our writings lack of
conhesion, this means that we will not use linking words, demonstrative pronouns... As a
result, our ideas will not connect and stick together so readers can be easy to
misunderstand. For instance:’ People are getting busier with their jobs nowadays. Thus,
they are more likely to gain weight.’ These two sentences absolutely have no errors in
grammar and vocabulary as well, connected by ‘thus’. But we do not understand what the
two ideas talk about. We can correct them like that: ‘People are getting busier with their
jobs nowadays. Thus, they have less time for fitness exercises and become more likely to
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gain weight.’ In particular, on writing tests, candidates will get no points on cohesive
when they don’t use conhesive divices like linking words, pronouns ... to make their ideas
become smooth and logical.

There is a wide variety cohesive device that can be used to make cohesion writings. The
first way I would like to mention is that we should use personal pronouns and
demonstrative pronouns (this, those, that, these…) which are helpful for us avoid
repetition by referring to something that has been already been mentioned. For example:
“My professor’s lecture today was quite interesting. It was about the poetry of I.S Eliot”.
We can see in this sentence that a pronoun “it” is used to my professors lecture in the
previous sentences by referring to the lecture with the pronoun “it”. The writer creates a
connection between the two sentences. Another example of demonstrative pronouns: “I
love ThuongMai University. This school offers many opportunities”. Like previous
cohesive devices, a demonstrative pronoun ‘this’ requires antecedents in order to connect
sentences to those that come before. The second way is that we had better use linking
words. The way to make our writings more conhesive is using words that make specific
kinds of connection. We can use certain words and phrases to help organized our writings
and guide readers. There are many different categories of linking words. Some of them
include words and phrases used to make lists like: First, second, third, to begin with,
finally… In additon, there are also words and phrases used to give example like: For
example, for instance, namely, in other words… or we have words and phares used to
genenralize such as: in general, generrally, on the whole ... and words and phrases used to
show a result or consequences are: so, therefore, thus, consequence. When using these
words and phrases effectively help readers understand the meaning and relationships
between each idea and topic sentences in the text clearly. The third way of helping our
writings have a good cohesion is using synonyms. Like using pronouns, using synonyms
also prevent the frequent repetition of a word or words such as small and little. Another
common form of cohesive device is trasitional words and phrases. These can be simple
conjunctions. They can be more complex because a cohesive writing needs to transitions
from our idea to another in a logical way or flow. Many trasitions can go at the beginning

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or at the end of sentences, in the middle, but wherever they are, they are set off from the
rest of the sentences by commas. We have an example of this: “Teacher’s Day, for
example, honors teachers who have inspired generations of students”. Last but not least,
we should use the definite article “the”. It is the best way to connect sentences together.
For instance, “I bought a Math book last week. The book is really useful for my study”.
The last way is that we should use adverbial clauses such as: because, because of, while,
whereas .When a sentences begins with an adverbial clause, it must be a comma between
this clause and the main. By this way, our ideas can be connected well and our supporting
sentences will be stickier with the topic sentences. Finally, cohesion is an improtant factor
of a good writing. There are some ways of making a cohesive paragraph or writing and I
belived when we follow them, we are successful in writing a cohesive writing.

In conclusion, an academic writing is improved by coherence and cohesion. Without

coherence and cohesion, readers will become confused and even uninterested in the
articles. Your ideas become lost and the primary objective of writing is not achieved.

Phần 2: BÀI TẬP TÌNH HUỐNG

Situation: Find one true writing example and analyze it to show how successfully
coherent and cohesive it is. (Coherence and cohesion)

Here is an example of coherence and cohesion in use below so we can see the way they
are used to improve in writing a real way.

Topic: When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. To what
extent do you agree or disagree?

“Many people choose their jobs based on the size of the salary offered. Personally, I
disagree with the idea that money is the key consideration when deciding on a career
because I believe that other factors are equally important.

On the one hand, I agree that money is necessary in order for people to meet their basic
needs. For example, we all need money to pay for housing, food, bills, health care, and
education. Most people consider it a priority to at least earn a salary that allows them to
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cover these needs and have a reasonable quality of life. If people chose their jobs based
on enjoyment or other non-financial factors, they might find it difficult to support
themselves. Artists and musicians, for instance, are known for choosing a career path
that they love, but that does not always provide them with enough money to live
comfortably and raise a family.

Nevertheless, I believe that other considerations are just as important as what we earn in
our jobs. Firstly, personal relationships and the atmosphere in a workplace are extremely
important when choosing a job. Having a good manager or friendly colleagues, for
example, can make a huge difference to workers’ levels of happiness and general quality
of life. Secondly, many people’s feelings of job satisfaction come from their professional
achievements, the skills they learn, and the position they reach, rather than the money
they earn. Finally, some people choose a career because they want to help others and
contribute something positive to society.

In conclusion, while salaries certainly affect people’s choice of profession, I do not

believe that money outweighs all other motivators.” (Cre: Simon).

In this essay, Mr.Simon chooses to analyze both sides of the topic mentioned in the text.
Specifically, the body of the article, in the first part has been used to express the opinion
of the writer that many people set their income level as a more important criterion than
choosing a career; here is an idea which Mr.Simon does not agree. In the second part,
Mr.Simon turned to his main idea that was also the main idea of the essay mentioned in
the thesis statement.In particular, the writer used to inverse structure: ‘nevertheless’ a
very smart way of writing. It could remarkable the gist of the essay.

Futhermore, the writer brought into play with basic structure such as passive voice
(artists and musicians… are known for choosing a career path…), conditional sentences
(If people chose their jobs…. they might find it difficult to...).

Besides, one of the compulsory of the essay is conherence and cohesion which was
successfully performed by Mr.Simon. Firstly, people can completely understand what the
topic of the essay is, and it has a well essential organization to create a coherence essay.
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In the introduction, the content of the article was given clearly: “when choosing a job, the
salary is the most important consideration and do you agree or disagree”?

The topic in the paragraph one is ‘I agree that money is necessary in order for people to
meet their basic needs’ and supporting ideas are ‘we all need money to pay for housing,
food, bills, health care, and education, ‘Most people consider it a priority to at least earn
a salary that allows them to cover these needs and have a reasonable quality of life’, ‘If
people chose their jobs based on enjoyment or other non-financial….’ The order of the
paragraph two is done with satisfactory readers by the writer. All of them are linked
together in order to support for the topic sentences. It is the fact that no sentences are
unclear and out of order.

The next thing I would like to metion is that smoothy plays an important part in making
coherent paragraph. Smooth flow can be achieved through sentence combining and
through the use of transition that provide the links between ideas. There are a lot of
transitions that the writer used to: for example, however, to conclude, firstly, as a result,
secondly… Adding transition makes the ideas and sentences easier to follow. If the ideas
are logically arranged but they are not smooth, the wititing is inherent. In this essay, the
writer made it careffully.

In addition to the cohesion of the essay, there are many linking words: because, and, so,
but …The personal pronouns ‘it’: ‘we all need money to pay for housing, food, bills,
health care… Most people consider it a priority to at least earn a salary’.

Moreover, cohesion devices like demonstrative pronouns: that: ‘…known for choosing a
career path that they love…’, synonyms : jobs and career, the salary and money, the key
consideration and,…. The words ‘the key consideration’ are also repeated, again using
synonyms: ‘necessary’.

And the writer also used to transitions in the text: personally, firstly, secondly, for
example, for instance … and adverbial clauses: because, when like “the key consideration
when deciding on a career because I believe that other factors are equally important”.

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It is irrrefutable that most of cohesion devices which has been thoroughly used in the
essay.Moreove, it connects opinions together to create a solid bond, and also make reader
gone with the wind when explore it the essay about choosing a job.

To summarize, I hope that this analysis will help us better understand coherence and
cohesion of the article. In the same way, I find that not only grammar and vocabulary
should be focused but also coherence and cohesion are value keys to have excellent
writings.

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