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By UGO Team August 15, 2011 |
11 | Shot To The Hear--er, Eye, er...Face |
Film: Blade, Blade II
Weapon: Specialized Hemoglobin Shot
What's It Do: To a regular human being, this blue liquid in
syringe is nothing more than an anti-coagulant. In layman terms: it helps stop
bleeding from open wounds. To the vampires however, it winds up exploding them
in such CGI awesome that even Wesley Snipes pauses to acknowledge the bad-ass
nature of it.
We're sure the new Fright Night remake would be five minutes
long if Colin Farrell had to deal with Wesley Snipes, who's still down to don
the shades again if the story's right. We just hope this vampire slaying weapon
comes back, since it's even cooler than a UV shotgun or stake launcher. It's a
perfect example of why science and nature is forever deadlier than even garlic
pepper spray.
10 | Got Wood? |
Film: From Dusk Till Dawn
Weapon: A Pencil*
Fred "The Hammer" Williamson is something of a
bad-ass. See, he not only kicked ass a football player, but is one of the
blaxsploitation legends for his turn in Boss ****** (NSFW title, believe us).
But in this Tarantino scripted, Robert Rodriguez helmed picture of a vampire
bloodbath at a run-down Mexican trucker bar (which is actually a Mayan temple)
the vampires pick the wrong ex-footballer to deal with.
Sure, Williamson (here as "Frost") beats up
vampires with his bare hands. He even rips the still-beating heart out of one!
But that's not the weapon of choice here. That honor belongs to a good ol' #2
that just happens to be in a bar filled with bloodsuckers, a toe-sucker and
George Clooney.
*Note: No one else but Fred Williamson is bad-ass enough to
kill a vampire with a pencil. If anyone else tries, they'll die a horrible
death.
9 | Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Inches Do Matter |
Weapon: Ruler
Film: Buffy The Vampire Slayer
In vampire lore's longest death sequence ever (really, we
checked) Pee-Wee's death at the hands of the original Buffy Summers is
well-worth the wait. Doubly because it comes at the school dance and thanks to
a ruler rather than stake, garlic or cross.
The fact Rutger Hauer is playing a violin in the scene
makes it all the better. Adieu Pee Wee! May the...oh whatever, you just got
killed with a ruler. That's what being a henchman gets.